Those Who Mind Don’t Matter

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The Pastor’s Ass

The pastor entered his donkey in a race and
It won..

The pastor was so pleased with the donkey
That he entered it in the
Race
Again, and it won again.

The local paper read:

PASTOR’S
ASS OUT FRONT.

The Bishop was so upset with this kind of
Publicity that he ordered
The
Pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.

The next day, the local paper head line
Read:

BISHOP
SCRATCHES
PASTOR’S
ASS.
This was too much for the bishop, so he
Ordered the pastor to get
Rid
Of the donkey.

The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a
Nearby convent.

The local paper, hearing of the news, posted
The following headline
The
Next day:
NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.
The bishop fainted.

He informed the nun that she would have to
Get rid of the donkey, so she
Sold it to a farmer for $10.

The next day the paper read:

NUN
SELLS ASS FOR $10.
This was too much for the bishop, so he
Ordered the nun to buy back
The
Donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run
Wild..

The next day the headlines read:

NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.
The bishop was buried the next day.

The moral of the story is . . Being
Concerned about public opinion
Can bring you much grief and misery . .
Even shorten your life.
So be yourself and enjoy life.
Stop worrying about everyone else’s ass and You’ll be a lot happier And Live longer!

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Surprises, Tears, Laughter, and Jack Daniels!

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My adventure as a mom began somewhere in the ballpark of March 2006. I was working at an Urgent Care and “borrowed” one of our pregnancy tests because something juuuust wasn’t right. Well, in retrospect, everything had actually gone PERFECTLY because I was pregnant. My co-worker re-tested it a couple times from different boxes just to make sure and i obviously double checked again when I got home.

SHIT

Not the end of the world, but definitely not what I had been planning. I had just gotten engaged on Valentine’s Day of that year (which was probably the night that landed me in this “situation’ πŸ˜‰

So, we got to have the ever-so-pleasant talk with the parentals about our news.
“Mom, I have something to talk to you about.”
She stops, looks at me seriously and asks “Is it something I have to take you to Target for a test?”
“Ummmmm, yah, but i already did.”
“and you are?”
“yup”
She lets out a sigh and says, “I don’t know whether to hug you or spank you!”

She hugged me πŸ˜‰

17 weeks in I started spotting and went to the Dr.
I found out that day that I had miscarried at 9weeks and 6 days.
All this 1 week before the wedding.
(I didn’t think writing that would make me cry) hold on…
A big hug goes out to all of you moms and dads who have lost a pregnancy. I know there are many. With statistics of 1 in 4 pregnancies ending in miscarriage, we’re kind of a big club.

Thankfully, I got pregnant just as easily with the next one as I did the first! The next step of the adventure was probably in October 2006. Again, totally out of the blue and very surprising.
And because God has an awesome sense of humor, my fertility goes on to get me pregnant AGAIN just a short 4 months after Kaylee was born. At this point, Brent and I are contemplating having separate closets space just to be sure this doesn’t happen again.

I am the mom who was breastfeeding a 4 month old, took a pregnancy test and found out the next one was on its way…ready or not. My favorite moment in our marriage so far is when my husband, Brent, came home from work and I held our daughter up and said, “Welcome home daddy, hey guess what?? I’m gonna be a big sister next year!!”

HIS FACE WAS PRICELESS!!!

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It was at the birth of my daughter, Macy, that I succumbed to the fact that my motherhood adventure was going to be nothing I could control. I still kind of want to have another baby and PLAN on having the baby and PLAN when they will be born…just to say I did it. Not gonna happen πŸ˜‰

They say the 1st year of marriage is always the hardest…I call bullshit!
Ours hit probably at year 3 with two girls ages 1 and 2 and me married to a busy farmer and struggling to balance mommyhood, wifehood, work life, social life, and just time for ME!

I only threw a bottle at my husband once…I’m pretty sure

I cried the first time Kaylee fell down a flight of stairs

I yelled at Brent when he got home once because it was OBVIOUSLY his fault both kids were screaming, naked, covered in their own body fluids, and I’m scrubbing the carpet also full of said body fluids.

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I fed my kids formula after about 12 weeks because I wanted to. Me and the breast pump were through with 8-a-day milkings. πŸ˜‰ As far as I can tell they are turning out just fine.

I realized just how much I like the taste of a Jack n Coke. Through many experiments. They all turned out a positive.

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I suffered some mommy guilt when i started working more and they were at daycare 5 days a week instead of 2 or 3. Again, they seem to have adjusted fine.

I probably didn’t get them their vaccinations right on schedule, but that’s what Kindergarten check ups are for right?! Get ’em all up to speed! Macy, at 5, still puts most things in her mouth and when you live on a farm…that gives you some pretty good coverage.

I let them play in the mud

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I worry about them not eating enough fruits and vegetables (as I dole out Mcnuggets)

I don’t give band aids unless there’s blood. Ice packs, however, can be put on anything.

I let them wander through the barn by themselves with 700-1000 lbs animals lumbering around.

I get nervous about letting them be out in the barn with 700-1000 lbs animals lumbering around

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I bought bike helmets…they don’t wear them…But like a “good mom” i bought them πŸ˜‰

We don’t use the word “hate”

Other colorful 4 letter words have been spoken though…in correct context. I will take full blame for that.

Brent and I argue in front of them some…They haven’t expressed any feelings of fear towards this. Usually I hear, “MOM, stop yelling at dad, he works really hard for our family and you should love him!” Geee, I wonder who’s a daddy’s girl.

“DAD, you should really put your own clothes away like mom does.” AAAAAAND we’re back on track.

I’m only 6 years into my adventure and so far, I’m having a blast! Not everyday, but most days. We’re happier more than we’re sad. There’s more laughter than there is yelling, there’s more clothes than I know what to do with, and I am supported by Brent’s family and mine which is priceless.

I was a surprise to my mom too. She is no stranger to hard work and sacrifice so I can’t think of anyone else better to emulate. I joke about turning into my mother…a girl’s worst nightmare right?! It wouldn’t be such a horrible thing if I did.
I hope my girls can say the same one day.

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Enjoy your families this Mother’s Day.

What to do

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I know I’m not the only farm wife in America who hasn’t seen her husband before the 1-2 am hour in the last few weeks. Combining corn and soybeans has started and keeps the farmers busy

Am I right?!

I can only stay on task with the laundry, dishes, kids, cooking, and parenting for so long until i NEED something different. Even if its a new face in my house to balance out the the 4 and 5 year olds I always look at! Just kidding…kind of πŸ˜‰

So I had the kids put their dishes away and I very skillfully tricked them into thinking it was REALLY fun to haul the 2 loads of laundry down from upstairs. They not only loved it, but they changed loads for me too!! I gotta say, I’m really getting the knack at the parenting stuff…not gonna lie!

And while they were doing this I fulfilled one of my goals I set for myself at the AgChat Foundation Confrence and that was to set up a YouTube Channel to start sharing our family, our farm, and our story!

So with all this time on my hands after my child laborers did their thing, I IDID!

Its in the beginning stages, of course, so bare with me…the first few videos will be me trying to learn how to use the programs.

And as some of you know…My husband Brent, LOVES to take pics and videos of himself farming and post them to Twitter and Facebook. He also likes to rub my nose in ALL of the likes he gets! Dork!

So check it out, wait for more, and enjoy what you see!!

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Where’s the food without the farmer? WTF??

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Where's the food without the farmer? WTF??

http://www.ilovefarmers.com

A whole new world!

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Back from the dead!!!!

I am sitting in the Sheraton Hotel in Indianapolis, IN and reminiscing on an awesome 2 days I have spent here. Not only did I get to get away form my kids for a couple days but I got to do it with my husband! And I also had the opportunity to meet some pretty awesome people. Farmers from all different areas of the midwest came together to discuss one HUGE topic in our lives… “super weeds” kind of like those “super bugs” you hear about in hospitals. MRSA, VRE, ESBL to name a few. Only in the farming world these are called palmar amaranth, marystail, giant ragweed, morning glory…etc. Basically, these weeds have become resistant to an herbicide called geophosphate AKA RoundUp. What this means is farmers who would normally spray their fields with this herbicide are now faced with a huge problem because these “super weeds” have adapted
and have become resistant to the chemical and are taking over corn, soybean, and cotton fields. Much like MRSA is resistant to antibiotics. Thankfully the medical field has come up with a different medication, usually Vancomyacin, that will aid in the treatment of MRSA. Scientists have also come up with a solution to our geophosphate resistant traits in weeds…YES!!!!! Some of the brightest minds in the world have created a seed (lets stick with corn) that can be planted and treated with its “sister” product of EnlistDuo and it does not harm the plant but will kill those pesky weeds. Farmers will be able to grow corn without the weeds, and we all know that weeds are very detrimental to plants, flowers, and our crops. These last 2 days Brent and I have sat through lectures and powerpoints teaching us about all the chemistry and biology that went into making this new product and I was blown away. I used to think “what…you plant a seed, you water it, and it grows, and you have food!” I had never thought about all the time spent developing these products. Years!!! Yes YEARS go into technology like this!
I totally get that there is a fear in consumers about GMO crops and pesticide/herbicide treatments. It is kind of a scarry thought if you dont know the whole story. The products don’t come to the farmers cheap. Anti-weed products are SUPER expensive so trust me, we don’t spray more than we absolutely have to. And here’s another truth…farmers and ranchers feed my family. They feed your family too. Families are multiplying by the day and more people in this country will need food. We need to grow more food for more people using less land, less water, and most importantly less impact on our environment. Technology like this will do just that! I encourage you to ask your questions. If not here then somewhere to someone. If you’re leary of all this new fangled technology then just ask a farmer about it because they are EXCITED about it. It will keep their operations going for generations which is what we need! They are the “doctors” of their fields and they rely on science and technology to become more efficient.
I tried to keep this short and sweet, but really, IF YOU HAVE QUESTIONS…ASK!!!!

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Kaylee and Macy standing in our field of Dekalb corn. Thanks to modern technology our corn grew 6 inches in 6 days! What a blessing!

Late night thoughts

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After writing my last post I was thinking to myself that I may have to clarify something. Just a note that the conversation I had written was in condensed form. I don’t want anyone reading it to be confused by what I meant by “no hormones ” and “no antibiotics” in the milk.
At the time of processing and bottling of pasteurized milk, there can not be any traces of antibiotics in the milk. Even though the cow may have been treated with it for some disease, the milk is dumped during treatment and only non treated milk goes into the tank. We observe the proper withdrawl period, then before we add the cows milk back into production we do an on the farm testing to make sure there are no more antibiotics in her milk. The confusing thing about hormones in milk is that there ARE natural hormones the cow produces to make milk. Much like us humans. The difference may be that some farms use synthetic hormones to help keep her on a steady wave of production. Not necessarily to make more milk but to keep her at her peek milking amount for a little longer which doesn’t have any negative effects on the animal.
So, in short, to clarify…there are naturally produced hormones in the milk, and there are no traces of antibiotics in the milk you are drinking. Both organic and conventional

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Looking the part

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Oh yes I know, its been forever and a day since I’ve posted, but what can I say?! 2 jobs, 2 kids…cough cough, i’m sorry…3 kids (including hubby) and a farm!

No excuse I now because theres some really fantastic bloggers out there who are just as busy as me who seem to get it all done!

Brent and I enjoyed a fabulous weekend with the Minnesota Farm Bureau at our annual Young Farmer and Rancher’s Confrence this past weekend. During it I won a Pioneer corn hat! SCORE!!! The rest were either John Deere or CAT so I thought this was a pretty good comprimise of prizes πŸ™‚ Seeing as how we’re a “red family” round here.

I wore it out shopping the other day and was stopped by an older gentleman who said, “OH a farmers wife eh?!” He knew he liked me right away. I didn’t have quite the same stardom later in the day when I went to the grocery store! Hmmmm, you wouldnt think that by wearing a simple hat could raise an awareness. I was at the milk cooler and picked the milks I always picked, but realized there was a sale on another brand. It just so happens that this carton said “Hormone Free” “Antibiotic Free” I’m already preparing my come back for Brent when he sees this and assumes I have fallen into the marketing trap of these catch phrases. THEY WERE ON SAAAAALE…was what I came up with. A woman beside me says, “Oh good choice…see here it says they are hormone and antibiotic free!” hmmm, “Well, its on sale so thats why I’m buying them, and there are no hormones or antibiotics in ANY milk or else they couldnt sell them.” She looks at me and looks up at my infamous hat and says, “Oh so can I assume by your hat that you farm? UGH dont even get me strted on your GMO’s that you use to make more money and poison the rest of us. How can you sleep at night knowing what you’re doing. Are you a mother?? How can you be so horrible to your own children???”

I have NEVER been approached with this type of hostility EVER! I had no idea how to respond…Usually when convos come up we’re able to discuss amicablly and even agree to disagree. “Yes, ma’am, my family does farm. We live on the farm, we all work on the farm, and there is no other place I’d rather raise my kids. Where they learn the quality of hard work, honesty, circle of life, and commitment to common decency. I have no trouble sleeping because I protect my kids just like any other mother does, and I do NOT appreciate you attacking my mothering.”

There are a few things that will set my devil horns high on my head and one of them is the assumption that my kids are somehow neglected or treated badly. Momma bear will roar if you even touch on this subject. You had better get to know me before you rage your ugly head at me!

Unfortunatley this conversation didn’t end well, like it could have. She had her mind made up that farmers are the devil and I was the person in front of her wearing the damn Pioneer hat waiting for a verbal assault.

To make money???? HAHAHA oh please! Thats why I’m shopping at the Clearance racks at Target, wearing my FREE hat, driving a 7 y/o Chevy Impala, and spending my $$$ on mostly new clothes for my girls, not myself. Oh yah…and buying the MILK ON SALE!!! Maybe at somepoint this woman will be willing to listen to the other half of the story, until then, I guess I’ll keep wearing my Pioneer hat to the grocery store and see what other conversations I can start!

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